basedpidgeot:

gf: babe come over

me (a lawnmower) : no i cant im cutting the grass and you live in the sky

gf: my parents are out

me: image

(via shinedownupon)

troyesivan:

is it morally okay to pray that your crush’s relationship doesn’t work out

(via hotboyproblems)

iwishihadafather:

i dont care about easter at all i just want clearance candy

hungarian:

today in class someone sneezed & my teacher told them to shut up

(via hotboyproblems)

princeofhopefulness:

deodrant:

*tries to talk*

*gets ignored*

“you should talk more!”

(via crystallized-teardrops)

jesuschristvevo:

do dogs think in barks

(via hotboyproblems)

scott-pilgrimage:

whosromeo:

i think it’s cute when someone admits they have a crush on you

i think it’s a fucking miracle 

(via hotboyproblems)

tibets:

here’s a video of me

(Source: weloveshortvideos.com, via bitchbot)

unlawfully:

Having a cute waiter like I’ll have the chicken with a side of that dick

(via crystallized-teardrops)

did you know that bashing my music taste increases your chances of changing my opinion by 0%

(Source: exhaledoom, via hotboyproblems)

hoodratzayn:

i believe in hate at first sight

(Source: jadethrwall, via hotboyproblems)

relahvant:

puppies ARISE

relahvant:

puppies ARISE

(via crystallized-teardrops)